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The african grey--have i done my homework?????


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I feel for you Nancy! I'm glad you had Sophie there for comfort. In raising 3 boys, the hardest thing for me to do was take my hands off of them. They are going to do what they are going to do, and you can't do it for them. That was so hard for me! However, I finally learned to put it in God's hands and let it go.

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I know it is out of my hands. I sure do hope God is listening, and has a plan... my poor girlfriend suffered the same, as well as her son quit the police academy the day before graduation... I can't even imagine! Nancy

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I know it is out of my hands. I sure do hope God is listening, and has a plan... my poor girlfriend suffered the same, as well as her son quit the police academy the day before graduation... I can't even imagine! Nancy

 

That could be a blessing. I was telling my co-worker the other day - "there's no way in hell you could pay me enough to be a police officer in todays world". This is the generation of zero-respect.

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  • 6 months later...
 

What I love about this site, is we can talk about our birds, but we can also talk about our children! Our disappointments, our fears,our goals! As Sophie is treated like the third child, the goals are similar, and we always believe in them when they disappoint! Nancy

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  • 4 years later...

I have my beautiful baby Habana who will be 5 months on the 22nd of this month.  I had to wean her which was an absolute nightmare and so scary for me.  She screamed and wanted nothing to do with me.  I was heartbroken, but I stuck it out.  I read all the books and bought clickers and tried to train.......for about 10 minutes and she wasn't having it!  SO, I let her be.  I never raised my voice, I talked to her for hours and hours and told her how proud I was of her as she transitioned to pellets and other fruits and vegetables.  I make an amazing spread for her breakfast and lunch.  It took 5 weeks and she flew from her cage(she is clipped but can still move) and landed on my chest.  She finally decided I was the coolest thing in the world and she has made my life amazing.  I wouldn't recommend a Grey to most people.  I am fortunate to be able to spend 10+ hours a day with her and if she could live on me she would.  It is an enormous investment.  Cages are $1000 and you need perches and play stands, toys, organic fresh food is expensive, vets are expensive and the most important part is you have to be patient and love them.  Entertain them.  I was a standup comic for 20 years and I love talking and am now a homebody!  I am in a unique position to give her everything she needs and spend all day with her out of the cage playing and whistling and she has forced me to become patient and accept defeat with dignity!  The joy she gives me outweighs the bad.  But there are downsides.  Throwing food, screaming if I am holding something she has never seen before, apprehension towards others and dogs and noises, firecrackers were just recently an issue.  They need a routine and they need an owner who realizes you now have a companion more important than yourself!  I had to furnish a second bedroom because she liked my room better.  I happily gave her that.  This amazing creature was the best decision I have made in a long time.  But, you need to be honest with yourself before you buy one and be ready to dedicate your life to your companion.  I wanted a Grey since I was 16, but I wasn't mature enough, I was never at home, I traveled and partied, didn't have my priorities in order etc.  28 years later I finally got one.  I wanted one the whole time, but I knew I was too self absorbed to love anyone else.  That is all gone now and I hope if you do adopt or buy a Grey that you honestly look in the mirror and ask yourself AM I READY?  My parrot was born into retirement and she knows I would never hurt her and she has everything, but that trust doesn't happen overnight.   Please do not get one until you are ready!  I didn't get lucky with my baby!  I sacrificed my life for hers and she is now my best friend!

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Your story is such an important one to tell. The sacrifice and commitment we must make to these magnificent creatures is great. 

 

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Thank you for saying that!!  I got in way over my head at the beginning, but I was determined to give her and say to her everything I would have wanted!  The rewards are just so great and I am only trying to impart things that also show the reality of this decision.  These special parrots have so much love to share, but they are not circus animals and I dread people buying them to try and show off or teach them bad words or habits.  This is my child, my love and my friend and if you can't view them in that light you have no business tearing their life apart because you don't have the time, patience or discipline!!!!IMG_1086.thumb.jpeg.8545adcf74ef53f7ca78cf4b85c819e7.jpeg

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Edited by Sam44
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@Timbersmom I am happy you understood my message.  It was a little personal and while I am not an activist, I now understand why these beautiful companions are not recommended!  They are so labor intensive that it blew my mind!  I hope you have a wonderful day!!!!

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It becomes especially evident just how incredible they are once they become a part of your household. I do experience pangs of guilt whenever I allow myself to think about all that they miss out on as a captive bird. Yes, most don't know anything else, but still.

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I never wanted children but I have one now.  I can never compare my love to a woman who has given birth, but I don't know anything I'd fight for harder.  Self sacrifice and devotion is an amazing quality to have.  I have a Pak-O-Bird that I can get Habana safely to my car and then she lights up riding on my shoulder!  I cannot begin to understand how someone would own a parrot like this and have an ounce of neglect in their body.  I worry about exercise and diet and we play a flying game that builds her muscles.  I wonder if she'd be happier in the jungle.  I told her a few weeks ago when she freaked out that you are safe with love and amazing food and don't have to outrun Jaguars and Baboons to enjoy your day...........so just chill!!  Lovingly, I said that and then as I rambled on I looked up and she was asleep!!  I smiled because her foot was up and I knew she felt safe and I remembered what I say doesn't matter that much.  It's action.  Thank you for sharing your thoughts!  That makes me happy to know I am not alone in this journey!

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No you are not alone! Relationships with these beautiful birds are empathic. Once you sync with them the connection simply flows. 

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  • 3 weeks later...

The best way I can describe having an African Grey is buying your way into a Calculus Final that will never end!  Dedication and education are hard to do every day!

Thank you all for making me a better companion!

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